Holy Ejaculating Panties, Batman!

I went into this new store in town where they sell all types of overpriced, designer clothes. I bought some punk panties for a friend. You know, skulls and ejaculating flowers and such. Included with the panties was a free religious amulet. Do I even need to continue typing? Thank you God for the sex flowers and our skulls? They also carried a line of Jlo clothes. Of course these only look good on Ms. Lopez and birthday cakes. Most of the clothes ranged from an extra-small to a medium. There were some larges, but they weren't. The girl says "Our sizes go all the way up to a 34 . If I can fit them, you can fit them." First of all, two of her could have a 3-legged race in my pants. Second, everybody in this town is fat! The only ones who could fit into most of this stuff are teenagers, and what teenager can spend $85 on a tank top? I give them 6 months. I did buy a skirt and fell in love with a totally unnecessary 80s cult top that I couldn't afford but looked pretty foxy on.
Did I mention the salesgirl kept on bringing up Ken? Ooh, are you daddy's girl? Is Ken on shift work? Does Ken Watch alot of hockey? Ooh you have a good daddy, don't you? Ooh, tell daddy to buy this for mommy?
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