Smorg-ass-bored

Can anyone tell me when all the peanut M&Ms became yellow? What is this about and why didn't I get to vote? I hate yellow! It's like snacking on a 2lb bag of corn! I mean a 45 gram bag. Whatever. I know they all supposedly taste the same, but if I had a choice, blue would be my preference. It's pretty and whenever you walk around with a blue mouth people have to wonder what you've been eating. I usually tell them I just had a hot dog and walk away. I bet some happy-go-lucky pothead hippy decided yellow was "happier" because it was the color of sunshine. Ya, and pee. Especially after a multivitamin!

I see they arrested someone in the JonBenet Ramsey case. At this point I don't even care. Sure, it's a sad thing that happened, but the whole thing has been turned into a huge media mess and a grand show of incompetence. Is there anyone who wasn't a suspect? I'm certainly not saying anyone deserved such tragedy, but if you ask me, anyone who puts their child through that kind of crap has something wrong with them already. Who puts a 5 year old in control-top pantyhose and false eyelashes and parades them around for cash. Probably the same clan of psychos who distributes the shiny metallic bra and panty sets in toddler sizes. Yes, you heard me, toddler bras! When Celia turns three we are putting a pole in the basement and she can finally learn a trade that everyone appreciates. Silly rabbit, trix are for kids.

I was thinking I should be keeping a log of good books that have been made into good movies, etc. Here's what I have so far:

Good Books To Good Movies:
Memoirs Of A Geisha
Five People You Meet In Heaven
Dreamcatcher
A Tree Grows In Brooklyn
A Christmas Carol (of course there are terribles versions of this too)
Rita Hayworth & the Shawshank Redemption
Party Monster
The Green Mile
The Stand (but I think it's ready for a remake)
The Harry Potter Movies
The Color Purple
Ichabod Crane & the Legend of Sleepy Hollow
Narnia (I actually haven't read the books but I hear from everyone they're good)
Bridget Jones (both)
The Lord of the Rings (All, but the first book was a little hard to get through, introductions to places and species, etc. Lots of footnotes)

Good Books To Mediocre Movies:
Charlie & The Chocolate Factory (I think I like the old movie better)
White Oleander
Peter Pan
The Power of One
Bloodwork
The Clan of the Cave Bear

Good Books To Atrocious Movies:
every Alice in Wonderland movie ever made
most of the older movies based on Stephen King books

Books That Would Make Good Movies:
The Talisman
The Secret Life of Bees
The Poisonwood Bible
Anything by Bryce Courtenay
The Catcher in the Rye

Mediocre/Awful Books That Made Better Movies:
The First Wives Club (trust me, the movie was a treat after the horrificness that was the book -imagine shit-sculptures. No shit!)
The Man in the Iron Mask
In God We Trust, All Others Pay Cash (A Christmas Story)
The Sound Of Music
The Princess Bride
Beaches (shut up)
A Series of Unfortunate Events (not the greatest movie, but not bad)

Books That are Totally Overrated:
Tuesdays With Morrie (let me die)
The Lovely Bones

Great Movies, Now I Need To Read The Books:
Hotel Rwanda

I think I'll try and keep this list updated.

What kind of name is JonBenet anyway? Poor kid.