Vernonitis
I used to have a friend who affectionately referred to me as a stressbasket. I think stressgrenade is a bit more realistic.
I've gained 5 pounds and today I bought the first tube of Clearasil since I was 16. My baby is nuts. Ken doesn't miss me anymore. Both my Grandmas are trying to CHANGE my wedding. They call all the time and one is mad that the other keeps calling her looking for me. My brother is never talking to me again over a conversation I didn't even know about. I have three or four things I've been trying to resolve for a month and every time I get close to a solution it gets fucked up. I feel like instead of getting some support or help I have a bunch of people telling me how they would do it better. I can't complain because I'm "the one who wanted a wedding" That's almost as comforting as "I told you so." But not quite.
Sometimes I wish the whole world would just climb up it's own ass and die.
On the whole I feel pretty good.
Last night I went to bed at two and Celia decided that four would be a good time to start her day. A few hours later I finally got her to calm down and dozed off just long enough to have a horrible nightmare. I woke up wishing Joe was around to hug because in my dream he was the only one who was nice to me! No pressure, Joe!!
I went to the movies and saw The Wedding Crashers and it was pretty funny. Vince Vaughn is big, dopey, sleazy and a little overweight. I'm sooo going to start stalking him when Ken dumps me for spending too much time in Vernon!
I went to the doctor today with Celia and he looked up her nose and said something about snotburgers. Awesome. Apparently the chorus of death rattles between the two of us is nothing to worry about. I knew it. I had to listen to my mom though, so as not to risk the guilt of an unneccessarily sick kiddo. I was a little disappointed to hear that bleeding from my ear is just something I should get used to. When people ask me why my brains are leaking out of my head I tell them "Because it's sexy, stupid"
I think my future mother-in-law is trying to kill me.
2 Comments:
Wow... sounds like you are having just tons of fun. I don't know how you can keep up with all that excitment. You better come home soon!!!
And yes I love how supportive everyone can be about wedding stuff. Lets see.. EVERYONE gave me a hard time because eloping is so much easier and quicker and cheaper, blah blah blah, regardless of what I actually wanted (which was my family there and not excluded because of the high price of a tropical plane ticket). Well I showed them? No wedding, and an 'ugly' tattoo that my dad would be ashamed to have showing if he were to walk me down the aisle. I'm sure you'll be able to figure it all out, and it'll be just how you want it, and screw everyone else! (Especially Ken - but that's the point right?)
And yes... your future mother-in-law IS trying to kill you.
Fuck you Joe :) (For making fun of my comments)
And yeah go ahead and move in on Tracy. Would love to see the Joe vs. Ken fight. Sorta like a Street Fighter round, except you are Srgt Guile with a broken arm, and Ken is... um... Ken. Hmm... wonder why there are no fighting games with a character named JOE in it? 'nuff said!
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